Here's Your Letter
by idontusethisanymorebye
Summary: I've taken ideas from 'Leaving Las Vegas' and created a MaiXJoey fic out of it. Joey is always drunk but alone. Mai is a prostitute but she's alone. Painful fic.
1. It's A Hard Life Baby, Get Over It

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**Disclaimer: **I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Author's Notes: I've taken the idea from the movie 'Leaving Las Vegas' and since I didn't watch the entire movie, I'll have to make it up. But this story is my own idea…for Joey and Mai. It's an AU fic, that's why Joey is 25 and Mai is 23. I don't like flames, so please you don't like, you don't review and just leave. 

**Here's Your Letter**

Chapter One: It's A Hard Life Baby, Get Over It

"We've enjoyed having you on our staff, Wheeler…but we have to let you go…" Mr Anderson said, sliding the envelope forward on the desk. 

The blond haired drunken man just stared at it before taking it in his shaking hand. Slowly he lifted the seal up and looked at the check within it. 

So he was fired. They didn't want him on their staff anymore. He knew why, but in his present state he was just burning with so much emotion. His life had been screwed ever since the day his wife had decided to leave. And when he was seventeen he'd decided to drink to get over her. It was stupid anyway, marrying at the age of sixteen. He lost his family when he married her but he frankly didn't give a flying fuck so long as he was with the woman he loved. No, it wasn't love. She just left him. Now, if you really loved someone you wouldn't leave them. What were those vows said for anyway? He was annoyed. When she left, his work began to fall, he began losing his memory of the night before and there was usually no money left because he'd spent it on a prostitute or booze. It was his life now. Drink all day, find some girl to fuck and then sleep it out. 

"I'm sorry…" he began crying silently looking at the ground. He didn't like crying so he put his hand on his face.  

Mr Anderson couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for the man. But Joey was quick to recover from any hard blow. He'd suffered worse. 

"What are you going to do now?" He asked him warily. 

Joey took his hand away from his face and looked at him in thought. His eyes were almost solemn, something which was very rare to see in Mr Wheeler. 

After a while he finally gave his reply. 

"I'm moving to Las Vegas."

*******

Joey opened all his draws and tipped everything in them into the black bin bag. He watched as knives, forks and spoons poured out of the box and then threw the draw aside. He repeated it with all the draws that there were in the house.

Next, he had piled everything wooden he had in his house in the back garden. Tables, chairs, draws, disassembled wardrobes and other things he had. Going to the garage he clambered through piles of metal scraps he thought he'd save for one day. One day, he used to think, he'd be famous for making the worlds first brand of Wheeler's cars. He thought he would be renowned by now; he should have been rolling in loot. But instead he was just getting pissed every night. He found the tank of oil and heaved it back to the garden, chucking it onto the wooden objects. It crashed and spilled clear liquid onto everything. Lighting a match, Joey threw it onto the heap and it was consumed in flames in less than a second.

Something flew from the inferno, and he picked it up. _That bitch and me huh? She can go to hell. _With that thought being the only, he tossed the picture of them into the blaze.           

After he had placed the ten bin bags on the curb, he got into his car, putting on his black shades. Looking back one last time at the house, he started the engine and left for his new home. 

Damn, he was getting annoyed with the radio stations. Nothing decent was coming on and the sound was distorted. He finally, out of pure anger, just hit the thing with his fist, breaking the whole thing. So now, he was on the highway, driving with one hand while sucking his knuckles on the other. The signs were telling him he was getting closer to his new home but his head just wasn't tuned in. All he could think about was finding the nearest pub and getting drunk. Just because he was moving, it didn't mean he was going to change the way he lived. Besides, it was the only way he knew how to live his life. 

The sky was darkening with each passing moment, and the moon was beginning to shine down upon him as he made his way to the city. 

"With all the casinos and bars around here ya might aswell just put the machines out on the street…" he thought aloud while cruising through the city. While on his way to find a bar he passed many, but none seemed to have the simplicity that he wanted. He just wanted a drink in a simple bar with a simple bartender. Not some flashy thing with loads of people around. 

With a resonated sigh, he decided to just spend whatever cash he had on drinks from the nearest supermarket. Which wasn't a lot but he still got pissed. He staggered back to his car, his eye sight becoming blurred as he tried to find a place to stay. When he was on the road a red light flashed. He didn't see it. 

Suddenly, his foot stomped down hard on the brakes and a skidding noise was followed by a tap on his car bonnet. He looked through the windshield to see an angry female, who needless to say was very attractive. She tapped on his window and he rolled it down, staring into her lavender eyes. 

"The light was red. You know, I don't know where you come from, but over here that means stop. Got it?" she said in a monotone. 

Joey just stared at her and nodded, transfixed by her beauty. She muttered "asshole" under her breath before she left and Joey watched as her smooth legs guided her to the other side of the road and her tight red dress made her body stand out like a carving from stone. 

"Hey, I'm sorry!" he called to her hoping she'd stop and turn back around. Instead she just held up a finger at him. "What a crass gesture…" Joey muttered to himself absent-mindedly. "And she didn't even turn around…I'll see you around!" He called to her. That statement made her turn and glare at him before she disappeared from sight. 

He shook his head and realized he'd held up some cars that were now honking for him to move his ass. He did so, tiredly and made his way to a nearby hotel. 

*******

_When I walk into the room…I become their ultimate desire. Whatever they want, I give them and…I actually am pleased at myself for being able to do that. It's a skill, I had to work hard to be able to do it and now that I can, I enjoy myself too. When I walk in the room it's usually 300 dollars…and then after we're done we negotiate and it's usually 500 dollars…but sometimes things don't work out that way. _

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Author's Notes: You will understand about that last bit more once the story gets going. That is if you want me to get going. Who wants me to continue? I'm not used to writing stuff like this, but I really understand a lot about why people do things like this now. And you will too, if you want to.                 __


	2. I Don't Need Sex, I Just Need Company

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**Disclaimer:** I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Author's Notes: **_Warning: Some very unpleasant things are said in this chapter. You've been warned. _**I hope I'm not banned, read my A/N at the bottom please to see why I'm doing this fic. P.S. Before any of you think **_NO I am NOT a hentai fan!_** I write this for people who can relate or for people who want to understand why things go on. Or for people who just need something to keep them busy.    ****

Chapter Two: I Don't Need Sex, I Just Need Company

"Hey!" Joey shouted through his window. The female just ignored him and continued walking. "I've been looking for ya," He said stopping the car. The female continued to block him out and walking. 

He looked ahead for a while, trying to gather himself and leapt out of the car, walking after her. When she saw him at her side she folded her arms and turned around to face his worn out yet lusty expression. 

"Look…" he said in his drunken state, "I'll pay you…" his hand reached into his pocket and grabbed a handful of money. He showed it to her and her eyes wondered to the money then back to him. "This much…I'm only staying a few blocks from here," he said pointing ahead not really paying attention to where he was pointing, "We can walk or take my car if you prefer. All you have to do is come to my place, fuck me and then do whatever the hell ya like."  

Staring at him, she considered his offer. He was drunk. It didn't really matter though, she had to get money and get it fast. The night was nearly out. Looking over his form, she figured he must just be the right size. She laughed a little and shook her head.

"Where's your car?" she asked. 

"Here." Joey answered leading her to the car. She looked over it, it seemed pretty fine. So it wasn't the fastest or the most expensive car she'd seen but it didn't matter. She could do worse…She got herself in and he handed her money. Counting it she nodded. 

"Where are you staying?" She asked him, obviously knowing he couldn't possibly afford a house. He didn't even have a decent car. 

"…_The Hole You're In_…" 

Mai laughed a little, a shook her head, "Um hon, I think it's _The Whole Year Inn_." 

Joey just stared at her. There was a slight smile on his face as he wondered just how this woman had walked into his car with him. He was really quite surprised that she hadn't told him to fuck off and shove his money up his, but then again he wouldn't have given up on trying. But something about this female just made him want to go after her, ignore all others…he hadn't felt something like this before for anyone. 

 "You're drunk, aren't you?" She smiled at him noticing his sudden fascination with her facial features. 

He blinked and shook his head at her, "What's your name?" 

"Mai." The female replied looking ahead. 

"Is that with a "y" or with an "i"?" he asked out of curiosity. 

"It's M-**A**-I." she smirked a little, noticing his bemused reaction. 

*******

Joey just sat on his bed, drinking his way through a bottle of vodka. The room was plain, he hadn't bothered to decorate, and he didn't have a wardrobe but a very small nightstand where his lamp was situated on. The balcony doors were slightly opening letting a faint breeze slip inside the already chilled room. 

When Mai entered the room, Joey almost choked on his drink when he saw her. She was wearing a tight black slip that left very little to imagination. Her hands were once again folded across her chest, just underneath her ample breasts and just above her waist. 

"Look, you can do what the fuck you want, you can be on top, you can cum in my face, just not in my hair," She said as she approached him, kneeling down before him. "I just washed it." She stated seductively, looking at him before trailing her hands down his sides. He reached over her to put his bottle on the nightstand and gasped when he felt her hands stroke his chest, before coming to his trousers. Her hands felt cold and it made his arousal multiply. 

She undid the button on his trousers, pulling it down until she was satisfied. As she began stroking his length, he leaned back further on the bed, swearing he was going to go insane if she didn't start sucking. But then, he thought, he didn't _feel _like it anymore. No, something was stopping him from taking this woman. He just wanted company for at least one night. He was alone, he had no one, and this was really the only person he could talk to. 

Mai was about to start when she suddenly felt his hands lift her face up. She threw him a questioning look, "What's wrong? Can't cum? Or do you just wanna fuck now?" Her lavender eyes glanced at the bed then to him. She was caught off guard when he was…crying? She'd never seen a man cry when she was working. But she had to say, it was upsetting. And it hurt her inside; she knew what was wrong with him. He didn't know what he wanted…and it made her question her own mind. Was fucking the hell out of strangers for money really worth it? Was sucking on their dicks really worth it? But she'd been brought up like this; she knew no other way to earn her money! She wasn't qualified to be a clean cut nurse or the simple housewife to some CEO of a major company! She wanted this pleasure…and she had no other choice. She was trapped against her will. 

"Just…stay with me. You can drink all the alcohol…but for fuck's sake just stay and listen to me." He was practically begging her now, with a pleading look in his eyes. The water in his eyes didn't fall over. The ones in hers didn't either. She stared at him for a while; neither of them blinked or said a word to each other. The only sound to be heard was their breathing and the leaves on the trees outside rustling against the wind. She nodded. 

*******

Mai staggered back into the bedroom, with another bottle of booze gripped tightly in her hand. She lay back down on the bed next to Joey, who was just staring at the ceiling, his eyes glazed over and explaining about his wife.

"That's just shit." Mai said, after Joey had finished with his life story. She took a sip from the bottle and warily put it on the nightstand beside her. She yawned, putting her hand over her mouth. 

"You…" Joey said looking at her. 

"What?" Mai said turning her head to look at him. 

"What about you? How did you end up-" he lifted an arm up and swished it around the room before dropping it back on the bed as if it were a heavy pile of bricks. "-here?" 

"On the game?" She asked. He nodded, closing his eyes. She looked at him and bit her lower lip before she gave him her reply. "My asshole dad and mum decided to abandon me with some shitty people…" 

"Mm…" he mumbled, clearly drifting off to sleep. Despite this she continued to talk to him. 

"They were jerks…they beat me up for not doing what they didn't tell me to do and beating me up for doing what they told me to do…" She felt her eyelids drop down and nestled closer to his body. Feeling her arms wrap around his waist, caused him to naturally slide one of his arms around her waist and the other around her back. "And I told them…up yours…" she mumbled. "Up yours you assholes…who needs your crappy love…I don't…" Her mumbling died down until she was sound asleep next to Joey. 

*******

_I asked him where the money was. He said it was in the draw…and I asked him what he wanted. He said he wanted to be on top…he pounded in me…I had to bite my lip to stop from crying. There was no rhythm…there was nothing of the sort. He was just on top…thrusting inside me; it felt like he was ripping me. After I thought it was over, I got up but he knocked me back down. He said he wasn't done with me yet. He pulled my hair hard and forced back my head…he…he forced me to open my mouth and he shoved his penis inside. I didn't do anything but struggle to breathe. I tried to pull away but he told me he was going to cum on my face…and when he did, he spread it through my hair. I felt dirty, I felt like I wanted to throw up right there and then. I just wanted to leave. Then he kicked me off the bed and told me to piss off…get out. _

_I was raped._

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Mai groaned when she felt pounding on her forehead. A headache had caught up with her that morning. 

_Morning…morning…_she thought. What was so important about that word? 

As she adjusted her vision she realized that it was the morning. She'd been out all night. He grabbed Joey's arm and checked the time on his watch. 

"Shit!" She hissed, getting off the bed and running towards the door at top speed. 

Joey didn't stir at all. He didn't even realize he wasn't holding the female in his arms anymore and his arms just slumped on the bed which was previously filled with the warm body of a woman.

Mai was running out of the building as fast as her legs would go. Her hair caught on a few odd objects as she passed but she was going so fast it pulled stands of her hair out. She didn't noticed and hailed the next cab she saw. 

She got in, and slumped backwards on the seat as she approached her destination. What excuse would she give Guy now? Coming back home with only 50 dollars…she retrieved the money and stared at it. But all she really could wonder was about that lonely, sad, man she'd slept next to. He was the very first man who didn't just want her for her body, the very first man to not to have sex with her, the very first man…she could remember the name of. 

_Joseph Wheeler…_

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Author's Notes: This is getting so bad; I hope I'm not banned. Reason for fic is because it's showing what happens to females like that who have no other choice but to enter the prostitution business. They're forced and it just isn't nice. I have to write like this to open my eyes as well as anyone else's. Review please.  


	3. You're My Alcohol

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**Disclaimer: **I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Author's Notes: Bex there is no fascination with me doing an R rated fic may I just say. It's there for a reason. Anyway, things are going to get from dark to darker. You've been warned. It's longer than my other chapters too. ^-^

Chapter Three: You're My Alcohol  

By the time she'd made it to the hotel, it was already nine o'clock. She couldn't have an excuse then. Guy would be mad at her, no, furious with her. A whole night's work and only coming home with…she paused at the door. 

_Think Mai, think. I got mugged on the way? No…Guy isn't stupid; he'll see right through that. I just didn't have a good night…that's all. _She knew it was all she could do and apologize.

Just as she was about to go inside, the door opened. He was there, looking very annoyed with her for being so late. 

"I'm sorry, I ended up further away from here than I'd expected." Mai said, stepping inside.

"How much did you get?" Guy asked, reaching his hand out for money. "This had better have been worth a whole nights work." 

Mai slowly got her money out from her jacket and put it in his hand. He left it outstretched, expecting more. She only turned around and placed her jacket on the bed. She knew he'd be expecting a reason. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. 

"It was a slow night." She said, turning around to face him, only to receive a hard slap. 

"You've been gone for a whole night and bring _this _home!" he spat at her, tossing the money in her face. 

"Guy listen-"

He slapped her again, "This isn't what I expect!" He gave her another slap, "You've been gone for shorter and brought more home!" he shoved her backwards, "It's your job-" once again she received a cold slap, "-to give the money to me!" She fell onto the table. 

As Mai regained herself, she looked up at the table. There was knife just in front of her. Ignoring his shouting and the pain in her cheeks and waist, she grabbed the knife and turned around to face him. She held up at him and he instantly froze looking at it. For one moment, Mai really thought she would stab him; at leas then she'd be free of him. But the truth was, she would never be free of him; he was constantly there, making her feel terrible. A reminder that he had shed her blood and therefore she had no free will of her own. And why was she still with him? She didn't love him, but she had nowhere else to go. She had no friends; she had no company…yet maybe…

"Here…" Mai said slowly, letting the knife drop into his hand. 

She quickly turned around and undid her dress for him to see her bare back, "Go on then! Like you did before!"

*******

_I knew something was going to happen. He had a knife nearby, I couldn't run. I never hate knives, but a knife with this person…I didn't know why it felt so cold in the room. But I was young…I didn't know, did I? He suddenly pulled me down onto the bed and kissed me. His tongue was halfway down my throat. I hated it. I wanted him to get off me but the knife in his hand…I could only comply. I cried. He moved me in a rocking motion and used the knife to cut off my clothes. He cut my back too. I cried through the pain; I was going to die if he kept on doing it. After that, he got off me, his hands were shaking and he was. I buried my head in the pillow. The blood was hot, I felt so cold though. He apologized. He kept on repeating it. Sorry…sorry…I'm so sorry…I just couldn't talk. He healed the wounds and begged me to stay with him. I couldn't say no, I had nowhere else to go. I was scared of him…I still am. _

*******

He stared at her, and began to shout hysterically in some other language. Mai sighed when he stormed out of the room, closing the door with a loud bang. Pushing her blonde hair back, she let out a faint gasp at the realization that he might have killed her. That was too risky. 

She took her clothes off, shakily dropping them to the ground as she entered the shower. The hot water steamed up the window straight away, it was scorching hot. Just the way she liked it. The bathroom door was locked so she was sure Guy couldn't invite himself in if he wanted some from her. Not that she'd give him any…but then again, it was like she was a robot; programmed to comply with what men wanted. That's how she ended up in bad situations. And she never usually paused to think of the consequences of her actions.   

When she went to have sex with someone, she usually remembered the condom, but in some cases, she actually forgot. And when that happened, she got so paranoid that she actually stole some of the men's wallets to take all of their money. Why? She had no idea. The chance of her getting an infection from one of the guys she slept with was high, but she never seemed to care. STI could easily be working her way through her right then and she didn't even care. Of course, it was obvious she hadn't caught an infection or she would have symptoms. She had none, she was all clear. 

As Mai washed herself, she closed her eyes and lifted her head up to the shower head. The water splashed onto her face. She felt cleaner, like it was washing away all her dirty feelings inside of her. Sometimes, she went outside in the rain late at night, just to feel it cleanse her. She wanted to take her clothes off and just dance around in it. She never got that far though. 

And then it happened. _He _came back into her mind. There he was, grinning at her, looking at her getting washed. And she didn't really give a flying fuck. In fact, she wished he was there, watching her. A smile spread across her face, as she wondered what she would do if he was there. Any man found it was cruel for a woman to play with herself in front of them. That was if they weren't gay. She grinned. Running her hands down her wet body, she massaged her waist. First she would work her hands there and slowly rub there working her way to her thighs. Then, she would run her hands back up to her breasts and-

"Mai!" 

Snapped out of her erotic fantasy, she groaned and looked at the door, where the handle was being pushed up and down. 

"What?!" She yelled, annoyed. "I'm not going to open the door until you tell me what you want!" 

There was a brief pause before Guy answered, "I need the keys! I left them in there this morning." 

Mai rolled her eyes and got out of the shower, not bothering to dry herself. She looked around for them and found them by the window. Now what were his keys doing there anyway? Grabbing them, she opened the door and shoved them in front of Guy. He just stared at her naked, wet body. Water dripped from the tips of her hair and he focused on one that slid down in between her breasts and to one side of her waist working its way down her thigh. 

"…Is that all?" She asked, knowing he was obviously focused on her body rather than her. Dropping the keys on the ground, she was about to shut the door, when he stopped it with his hand. "What else do you want?" She sighed. 

One word. "You." 

When Guy was hungry for lust, the look in his eyes was so seductive. She had experienced it before and was trying to teach herself not to fall under his charm. So far, she wasn't doing well. He kissed her gently, making Mai sigh in pleasure. His hands caressed her back softly as he began to move her away from the bathroom. She pulled back, smiling at him. 

"Shouldn't I get dried first?" She asked her forehead leant against his. 

"I'll do that." He whispered back mischievously, grinning. 

He licked his way down her neck; Mai leaned back her head and moaned. She didn't have sex last night, that's why she wanted this. Fuck she didn't care if the shower was still on or if it was Guy she was going to have sex with, she just needed it. So with that thought she got onto the bed, and let him work his way around her. 

"STOP!" She suddenly screamed at the top of her lungs, causing him to jump off her. 

"Jesus Christ, Mai!!" He yelled when he noticed nothing was wrong with her. She sat up, breathing heavily, and pushed her hair back. 

"…I-I don't know what just happened…" She said slowly, after a few moments. 

Mai watched him shrug and leave the building, obviously knowing he wasn't going to get any sexual pleasure from her after that outburst. She lay back down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Her eyes began to sting with tears. She knew exactly why she'd screamed. _She was scared_. Scared he was going to hurt her, scared he was going to whip out a knife, and scared he was going to…she couldn't think of the word. But she was frightened of him, nevertheless. He was someone who was unpredictable. Someone who could be deadly if driven to extremes. Driving him to violent extremes was just digging your own grave. She was shaking from the coldness, goose bumps covering her body. Guy just left her, left her when he knew she wasn't going to…she cried. Couldn't he at least of tried to talk to her?! _Damn bastard. _She thought while making her back to the shower, rubbing her cheeks. And this life she was damned to? Brilliant. It made her want to runaway again. 

Oh yes, Mai Valentine had run away before. Only he found her. He knew she wouldn't get far with no passport, so he had taken it away from her when he found her. She was at the airport and she tried to tell the people that her passport had been lost. They didn't believe her. Then she was screwed. Guy just took her home and told her never to do something like that again. She had tried runaway to live in another hotel in the city, but his "men" came to find her. How many men did he have patrolling the fucking city? 

She just decided to live with it. She'd die soon enough anyway. Hopefully he'd die before her and she could make the most of her last months or years. Or even days, if it was the case. 

So much for her childhood dreams of being a married woman to a loving husband and living in a little cottage with her three children. She cried more. That was the way she used to believe life was for most people. But it wasn't. There was so much pain, so much isolation and so many cold hearted people out there. There wasn't even such thing as "true love". So when people went on about it, they were lying to cover up the truth. The truth was it was a cold world and you were going to freeze unless you found somewhere that was warm. Even if it meant living with someone abusive. Like Guy. 

*******

Joey was actually feeling sober, which was a massive surprise to him. He could actually go one hour without drinking. And he wasn't even asleep. 

"Set. New record for Wheeler!" he said going out to the balcony.

But in fact he knew his reason for not drinking. He was out of beer and money, but the main reason was because it was enough to just think about that luscious blonde woman last night. 

_"Is that with a "y" or an "i"?_

_"It's M-**A**-I." _

What a woman. She was amazing. Well, the fact he didn't know whether she was good in bed, still hung over his head. It was like she was his alcohol and he needed to drink her. He had an attraction to her, an indescribable feeling. It felt like…the first time he met his wife. Only better. 

"Love," he thought aloud, while putting his arms on the railing. "LOVE!" He shouted, through the street, causing passer bys to stare at him. Joey grinned seductively at the schoolgirls before they ran off, giggling. 

Then he saw someone. It was _her_. He laughed, as he watched her leave someone's house. She noticed him as she looked up from across the road to the balcony. He didn't live especially high, which she thought was quite strange. The floor he lived on was deserted because no one wanted just a plain old view; they wanted a whole view of Las Vegas. 

"Hey there!" Joey yelled, to her. She just smiled and walked to the side of road, away from him. "Wait up Mai!" He shouted, climbing over the railing. 

"Joey, are you mental?!" Mai shouted, laughing a little as he stumbled. He gripped onto the side of the balcony and looked down warily. Mai just shook her head and turned to walk away, ignoring his shouts. 

"A little help?" He called out into the air, before he fell onto the ground with a hard crash. 

Mai had heard the noise and out of curiosity, decided to see what had happened to him. No doubt he'd fallen onto his ass and hurt himself. She just stood there, laughing her head off. No one had ever decided to jump off a balcony for her. And in a strange way, it was quite flattering. But was no big deal…was it?

"That's what you get for being an ass, you ass!" Mai shouted to him, as he stumbled back upwards. God dammit, he needed some help.

Joey shook his head and grinned at her, "Hey Mai, up for round two?" 

"We didn't even have a round one, and besides, I don't do second rounds." She said rolling her eyes, and walking away from him. 

Joey just blinked twice before turning to go to wherever the hell his feet would take him. But it led in the direction of where Mai was heading. 

_Why not?_ He thought wryly, continuing for her direction.

*******

Author's Notes: I think I'll end it there. ^-^ This chapter is a little longer; hopefully you're satisfied with it. And I assure you, it's going to get a lot more…darker. In a way, maybe even a little, _tiny_, speck of fluffiness may show itself. But only the _tiniest_. I wish someone would jump off a balcony for me.   


	4. I've Been Looking For You

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**Disclaimer: **I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Author's Notes: Guy **_is_** a name, by the way. Thought I'd let you know. It's getting darker. And darker. And darker…well actually, this chapter might not be too dark, but it's quite sinister anyhow. Read please, and review but mainly enjoy. ^-^ (I know, not the type of fic to enjoy…in one way and in another way it is!! But only if you WANT to, of course.)

Chapter Four: I've Been Looking For You

Mai made her way inside the casino and found the nearest table to the stage, where a quiet band was playing. She sat next to a man in his middle years and smiled gently at him before turning back to the stage. She sat silently next to him, knowing she had to get some money. He was clean, sober and looked alright for his age. She did have some money, but she only needed a little bit more to pass Guy's scale of great. She had _almost_ got three hundred dollars, and was quiet proud. But she needed the _almost_ to disappear. 

"Can I get you a drink?" The man beside her asked. 

Mai smiled and thought to herself, _Abut time the bastard bought me a drink. _"Yes please, a strong one. You choose." 

He smiled at her again and ordered the drinks. There was a longer pause and Mai decided it was time to chat him up and sweet talk him. He was easy on the eyes, his voice was quite level and he didn't seem to be eyeing her up like every other man she'd slept with. "So, are you here alone?" 

"Yes," he answered, looking at her, "I'm sure a young lady like you can't be alone here. Are you waiting for someone?" 

_Only for a buyer, like you…I hope he is anyway. I can't screw up. _She shook her head, and thanked the waiter when their drinks came. She took a really long sip and moved her eye to the corner to see if he was looking at her. No. Well, he soon would have to. 

"Don't lie; are you just using me to try and make someone jealous?" She asked, turning around and looking through the crowds of people. He grinned his response and shook his head. Mai decided to get right down to the point. "Where do you live?" 

"I live near the site that's under construction, near here." 

"Oh where they're building a new job centre or something like that," she laughed making him chuckle along, "I'm not really into things like that."

"Oh but I'm sure you are a _very _intelligent lady." He smiled, taking a drink. 

Mai looked at him and finally decided it was the right time. She finished her drink and turned to face him, leaning a little closer, "Are you looking for a date?" 

"What?!" The shocked man nearly choked out half of the beer he had in his hand. He slammed it down and his face filled with fury. 

"I'm sorry-"

"What are you, a hooker?!" He shouted, Mai hastily telling him to calm down. 

"Please sir, could you keep your voice down?" She asked, looking around at some people who were staring at them. 

He retrieved his wallet and flipped it open pointing at a family picture, "See, I have a wife, I'm married with two kids!" 

Mai averted her gaze, she didn't want to know. It just brought back hard memories and painful ones too. She put her hands up, "Alright I'm sorry."

He chucked some money on the counter and told him it was on him before leaving. Mai groaned and leant her forehead into her hands. Things hadn't gone well there, had they? Why the hell did he have to get the picture of his family out? All it did was give her a massive headache. She didn't need to know, for god's sake, about how well his life was going. Well, it couldn't be going that well---he was at a casino. What more proof did she need that marriage only led right back to where you started? Broke, alone and trashed. The way she'd started was the way she would be forever. But something made her strong enough to carry on and on---the sex. Fuck it, it's all she needed. It was probably the only time she felt _good_ in her life. The sheer pleasure and agonizingly fantastic sensations she received was all she really cared about anymore in life. 

So what was the deal with Joey? Damn, he was so hot but she couldn't figure him out. Why had he decided to start drinking and wasting his money on prostitutes? He'd had a bad past like her, and she recalled his wife who left him. Why didn't he just slump back down and forget about the bitch? That's what she'd have done in his position and with his lifestyle; she would have carried on having a normal life. He took it fore granted. But he understood her. He was probably the only one who could relate with her. They were probably both feeling the exact same pain. 

Mai made her way outside and tried to hail a cab. All the cabs were occupied, so she had to just try her luck with the nearest vehicle and person who'd take her. She stretched her arm out but all she really could _hope _in a small way was that somewhere, he would pass by. 

*******

_I looked for him last night. I don't know why---there was this…feeling inside of me. I was scared of it. I tried to find him in hopes he'd be able to help me with it. Was he feeling the same? I had to know. But I couldn't let an infatuation turn into anything more. I can't let it. My job is to…it to go out, get some money and come home. I can't be distracted. It costs and I can't pay up for my mistakes. I'm still scared for so many reasons…I don't really know what's going on. _

*******

There he was. Slumped on the bench by the road, with a bottle of whisky in his grasp. She walked over to him and just stared down at him shaking her head. He didn't look at her; he just stared at the ground blankly.

"I was looking for you." He said. 

"Really?" Mai asked tiredly. "Why would that be?" 

There was a silence in which Mai was sorely tempted out to point that his bottle was empty and he was still acting like it was full. She just shook her head and left him. He was drunk, it wouldn't do any good. Just a waste of breath. 

His mahogany eyes fixed on hers and Mai gulped. Damn, he was so cute. His eyes were glazed over…and she just wanted to…_hug him_? Now where the fucking hell did that come from?! 

"I wanted to ask ya, ya…if you wanted to have dinner with me…" Joey stared at her a while, obviously waiting for her reply. 

Mai sighed and actually wanted to say yes, but her ego was telling her to just forget him. So what if she felt jittery when he was about, so what if she felt happy when he was close, so what? It was just an infatuation, some sexual intensity. That's all. She hadn't bedded him that was it. Her mind was just wondering what it would feel like to have sex with him, that's all. 

"No." She finally answered. He didn't seem fazed at all. "No I can't have dinner with you." 

To anyone else, that would have cut them like a knife, but to Joey it was just a simple answer to a question he'd asked. Nothing more, nothing less. He didn't have to respond to it. 

Instead, he stood up; the bottle tumbled onto the ground. He approached her until he was face to face with her. His hand reached up for her cheek, he touched it gently with the tips of his fingers and kept it there, looking into her eyes. 

Mai was scared now. She wanted to faint in his arms. She was going insane. It felt like a mist had developed around them and the only thing she could see was him. The feeling of security was there; the feeling of warmth just engulfed her. It was so new to her and she didn't know what to do. 

"…That's a really nice dress you're wearing…" he whispered, however she still wondered if he was drunk. The next thing he said, told her he wasn't drunk at all. "I wish you hadn't left me so early." 

She gulped and tried to turn away but couldn't. It was the same look he had given her the night she'd found him. He wasn't drunk; his breath didn't smell of whisky. So what was going on with him? He had an empty bottle of whisky in his hand, and he was acting like he was drunk…but he wasn't? Something wasn't right. This wasn't how he usually was.

"I'm glad I did…" Mai answered back, silently. 

"Why?" 

Joey leaned in closer. So close, she could feel the heat radiating off his skin. She looked down at his lips which were almost touching hers. She shook her head, she couldn't let this happen. Her heart was pounding, and she was aching for his touch, but she couldn't bring herself to kiss him. 

"…Because something like this would have happened." She replied, moving her head back, but he continued to close in on her. 

"Why would this be such a bad thing?" 

"I didn't say it would be a _bad _thing…" She answered. 

Joey looked at her, before realizing she was uncomfortable. But he wanted to kiss her like he had wanted to do for a long time. He wanted to taste her lips, to ravish her body and make her scream his name over and over again until she got a soar throat. He wanted her _badly_, he wanted her _now_. He knew she wanted him, he could see the lust in her eyes. But she wasn't going easy on him. What was she waiting for? They both wanted--no--_needed_ each other! He knew it! 

"If it isn't a _bad_ thing, then why are you resisting now?" he asked, narrowing his eyes on her. 

Mai suddenly felt a surge of anger throughout her. What right did Joey have to question her?! If Mai Valentine couldn't do something, if she didn't want to do something, she would not be forced into it. But somehow she always was and she lost all her control. She became vulnerable. Besides, when was the last time, someone like Joey had made her feel so insecure about herself? Plenty. She didn't need this right now, when she could be at home with Guy, who would be as equally persistent on her. But Joey also made her feel like nothing was going to be _wrong _anymore. Everything would be _ok_ and she would be safe with him. Damn him. She wished she'd never met him.

Suddenly, her hand came up and slapped him _hard_. It was so hard; he went flying to the ground. Mai's hand became red and sore, while Joey's cheek almost _bled_. 

Shaken, Mai hailed a cab and got in without another word to him. She was shaking like hell as she was driven home. Tears came down her reddened cheeks from her also reddened eyes. She stared at her shaking hands, in disbelief at what she'd done. She wished she hadn't. Her mind wondered back to the event where she'd mistaken a lonely married guy for a lonely married guy who wanted someone to fuck for the night. Why in that picture could she see herself and…Joey? Her and Joey having a family?! Being married?! She groaned and put her hands on her head, ducking her head low. She did _not _want to even _think_ about it. 

*******

Meanwhile, Joey had got up off the ground and stood, in pure and utter shock. She'd slapped him. She had snapped so violently, he had been caught off guard and…she'd slapped him. He stared ahead blankly, wondering just why he could _never _have any of the things he really wanted. Sure, he had alcohol and plenty of money to spend, but it didn't mean shit now. He just wanted Mai. That's all. Mai to stay with him, to talk to him, to _love_ him. 

He felt like giving up all the alcohol and money would somehow make her come to him. So then, he'd just have to do that. Give up all the alcohol and get some decent proper job whatever that may be. Then, she'd see a good thing. She'd see something worth while and it would give Joey a purpose for living. 

He walked to his car, slamming the door shut. He gripped his hands on the steering wheel, staring ahead absent-mindedly. The first thing he had to do was get rid of all his alcohol. He knew just how. Then, he had to invest whatever money he had in the bank. Then, he noted, he'd have to do something about his hellhole of an apartment. It looked like nothing. And he liked to be classy.

"And then," he sighed to himself, whole staring up the car, "I'll have to get a damn, fucking job." 

*******

Author's Notes: That wasn't…dark was it? Don't worry; I've got very dark things happening in future chapters. And more lemons. Possibly one in the next chapter. Maybe…Well, keep the reviews coming in! I need to know what you think of this fic…and…thanks to those of you that are supporting and helping me out! ^-^           


	5. If I See Something I Want, I Take

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**Disclaimer: **I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Author's Notes: By the way, I didn't say whether the lemon would be between Joey and Mai…OI'm really beginning to think I can't pull this whole angst thing off, with the chapters that I've got in line…but do not worry! I have got a little plan in store for you, my dear readers. When you think it's not going to get dark, and all you're reading is light romance and stuff, something VERY dark will happen. So, just bear that in mind. -

Chapter Five: If I See Something I Want, I Take

Mai walked into her hotel room, stopping suddenly, at the sight of Guy. He was on a chair; his head leant against the wall. She knew something was wrong, he was mumbling something and knocked his head against the wall as she entered. She stayed silent, and took of her jacket, placing it on the bed. 

"I-I had a really good night…" she said slowly and gently, pulling out her stash of money from her bra. She tossed it onto the bed, however he didn't move. She was terrified, and hoped that he would just climb into bed. He looked so tired and as if he was about to fall asleep but she knew him too well. Guy was unpredictable; she knew she had to be on her guard. Anything could happen, absolutely anything… 

"…Come here Mai," he said. 

Mai hesitantly made her way to him. He stood up and grabbed her by the neck, and pushed the side of her face against the wall violently. Mai gritted her teeth together, as he brought his mouth to her ear. His breathing was indescribably audible, and she could feel his sweat from his face on hers. He whispered in his most dangerous voice, "You can hear them, Mai…Behind this wall…They keep talking to me…" 

Mai pulled away as he stayed pressed up against the beige coloured wall. She stared at him for a while as he began whispering to himself again. She felt goose bumps move in on her skin as he slowly sat back down. 

"…Guy…are you ok?" She asked as quietly as she could.

He didn't reply. Mai backed away, moving away from him to the bed to be a safe distance away from him just incase he tried to do anything to her. 

"Go away. Get out of here. I'll never see you again." He said after a very tense silence. "**_Ever_**."

Mai stared blankly at him, trying to register his words. What was he telling her this for? She was being chucked out like some trash? So it meant he didn't need her anymore. She had suspected he'd been using the money for dealing, but what type of dealing she never knew. Maybe it was drugs, maybe it was shitty dealings with the 'wrong' kind, but she didn't really care. It was his life, if he screwed it, then at least he'd feel some of the same pain as Mai. 

She took her jacket and walked to the door, not bothering to say a farewell or to turn around. She decided to leave the money there for him. Maybe he'd find some use for it. More than she would anyway. She closed the door and put her jacket on, walking slowly away. She had a very uneasy feeling something very fatal was about to happen to him. As she was walking, she looked up to find three men. She knew them. They were some of the men who'd found her when she'd tried to run away. They walked past her; one eyed her up and down before continuing forward from where Mai had just left. She looked back and saw the gun in one of the taller men's hand. She turned back around. 

Where was she going to go now? Only one person came into her mind. Joey. He was the only one who could offer her a place to stay for a while until…until what? She was free now. Freedom. She was free. It was strange; she was finally after five years, free. She could make a new fresh start. A brand new start! So…so what was holding her back? It did seem…right. Not that Mai knew right from wrong anyway. But as she walked outside, into the night, and the crowded, filthy streets of Las Vegas, a new realization hit her. _She could do **whatever** she **wanted** now_. She could go live the dream that she'd wanted to as a child. And who with? Well that was easy. Joey. She could go to him, marry him, start a family and move away from this hell. They could both move on after the traumas they had faced in their pasts. They could finally enjoy each other's warm embraces, they could kiss, and they could fuck the living daylights out of each other _all day_, knowing that they'd both still be beside their lover in the morning. 

But Mai knew it was all too good to be true. She'd learnt not to believe what fantasies a part of her mind showed her. No matter how realistic it looked, it would never be. But what if this time it was different? All these indescribable feelings she was having for him, all these visions of her and him together…they didn't seem all that scary. So this was what she wanted, she finally decided. A family. She wanted to marry him, to have children…she wanted to love him, and for him to love her back. Would he? 

_Probably not, knowing that idiot_. Knowing him? Mai didn't know that idiot so why was she thinking like that?! Well, whatever was going on with her, she'd have to sort it out a.s.a.p. because she couldn't let anything like that slip out when she was going to _force_ him to let her stay with him.

As she hailed a cab, she swore she heard a banging noise. Probably just, the trigger of a gun had been pulled, and it had just gone off into the heart of a mixed up bastard.

* * *

****

Joey put the last bottle of beer in the carrier bag and left it out on the sidewalk. He'd just poured it all down the drain by the road. When he watched it disappear, he felt like he was one step closer to winning Mai. He was actually planning on finding her, but he wanted to see her after he'd changed. 

Now that the alcohol had been sorted, he walked inside to his room. Closing the door shut, he looked around the previously wallpapered room. He'd stripped all of it off, and was going to cover it all in a cream coloured paper, with a patterned design on. He wasn't exactly sure what type, but it was going to have to look good. It looked so bare, his room looked empty. He'd chucked all the dying plants out also, as well as all his pointless accessories. For example, why the hell did he need to have a whole stack of old issues of _Playboy_?

Joey sighed and slumped onto the bed on his front, completely worn out. He was just about to think he would never pull this off when there was a knock at his door. 

With a groan he pulled himself off the comfortable bed, and went to see who was at the door. 

"Are you still up for that date?" 

He looked at her. It had worked. 

* * *

****

_I don't know why I went to him. But…it's that same feeling I get when I'm safe. I knew he'd protect me, I just knew he would. And even if he won't…I'm still better off with him than anyone else in this fucking city…I mean…he was the only one, the only one who didn't want me for my body. That night…it felt like…I was in a relationship. I was with my guy and we were acting like…So, I know I'm safe with him. And besides from that I would not take no as an answer._

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****

Mai was eating as though she hadn't had anything for a year. She offered to clear up Joey's plate as well, and he let her, watching her. He was looking over her lips, wishing his libido wouldn't be so damn domineering. ****

"You were telling me something Mai…about your family." Joey started, causing her to look up at him ever since they had arrived at the restaurant. 

"So?" She said putting her fork down and looking straight at him from across the table. 

"So…I didn't hear all of the story. They abandoned you when you were younger?" 

Mai looked at him, putting her chin on the back of her hand in a very posh way, the kind of stance that rich people. Joey was ready to laugh. It was like she was mocking them. Maybe in her own little way she was. 

"Why do you want to know?" She asked, looking intently at him. 

Joey shrugged, "I'm curious, Mai." 

Mai laughed, shoved the plate of food to one side and put her arms on the table, looking down at them. _He_ was curious about _her_? Why? What was so interesting about her life? Well up until this point, she fucked men for money and lived with an asshole that was using her for her money, who was probably now lying dead in a hospital somewhere, or if fate had been cruel, in a ditch. End of. But why did Joey care? What was he trying to get at? 

"…Yeah," she rubbed her thumb and forefinger together, on her left hand, "they never wanted me. I was a mistake and so they left me on the doorstep of some other people. They didn't care about me either but they kept me for chores and all of that stuff…" 

Joey shook his head. That was some shitty life. At least some people actually loved him enough to keep him. Not abandon him with some strangers. And anyway, how could anyone not love Mai? If they had seen her now, boy would they be begging for her to be in their lives again. But she was independent; she had become such an enticing woman all by herself. And that what made her so special, that's what made him want her. 

"That's just…" he began, however as he looked up into her eyes, he stopped. She was on the verge of tears…Her eyes looked outside the window; she was trying to hide herself from him. He looked at the table to where her soft hand was, and reached out for it with his own. 

Feeling his hand on hers, she looked back at him and took it away, folding her arms and slumping back against her chair. 

"And then when I was eighteen he offered to bring me here. To get away from a sad and dull life. He said he wanted me to live life to its fullest…but…" She shook her head. 

Joey continued to look at her, realizing he was feeling a little shiver form over his back. His heart began to race again. Goose bumps covered his lower arms. He couldn't stop looking at her, even when she wasn't looking back. He could stare at her all day like this. He knew it. He was afraid of this happening, but what was so bad about it? Mai had come to him like he thought she would, but he was scared if he told her about this feeling of his, she'd leave. He couldn't let her leave. Not when she was so close to him. He would not let her out of his sight. 

"Damn Mai…that's worse then me." 

"Why did decide to drink after she'd left you?" Mai asked suddenly, looking up at him. 

He stared at her blankly for a moment, before giving his answer. He leant in closer, so she did too, so that they were almost touching, "Because she was the first person who'd ever made me feel like you make me feel." 

"And that's?" Mai asked raising an eyebrow.

Joey smirked at her and shook his head. 

"We both know the answer to that." He leant back and looked at her. 

Mai smiled back at him, knowing what he meant. But she made all guys feel like that and she was a regular heartbreaker. But something made her know she would never break his heart. Well, she'd never want to anyway. She wanted him with her didn't she? Maybe this would be her new start…

* * *

****

Mai laughed when she looked around his room. She took off her jacket, and seated herself on the bed, seeing as how it was virtually only thing to sit on. 

"What's going on here then, Joseph?" She asked looking at him as he locked the door. 

"Redecorating." he replied, taking his own jacket off.

Mai sighed and closed her eyes, falling back onto the bed. It was warm and comfortable, just like when she'd come before. She smiled when his breathing graced her neck. 

"Why?" She asked, not opening her eyes. 

Joey played with a strand of her beautiful golden hair, resting his cheek on his other hand. He wasn't on the bed, he crouched by the side. He wanted to see her beautiful body there, it was a perfect image and he didn't want to ruin it. 

"…Because of you." He answered. She opened her eyes and looked up at him, her lavender eyes in a confused state. 

"Me?" 

"Yeah," Joey said, tracing her lips with his finger, "I wanted you to see something worth while Mai…I want you to stay with me. And if it means giving up my old shitty way of living I'll do it." 

"But why?" No one had ever done this for Mai before. No one had ever talked to her like that before. It was so flattering yet painful at the same time. Was she really worth all this? Him changing his whole way of living for her? It just made her wonder why. Was he bluffing? Probably, of course many people said that to her to make her sleep with them…but she didn't think that this man was the type to bluff about something like this. He did seem serious, he wasn't drunk, and the whole place looked so empty. No, it couldn't just be an act. He was telling the truth. So was she really worth all of this? "What is about me?" 

"You tell me," Joey answered, continuing to play with a lock of her hair, "I only hope if you stay we'll be able to find out." 

"_We'll_?" she asked, completely dumbfound. 

"Yeah. We'll…" He mumbled, his mouth just inches from her neck. 

Mai sighed and sat up, "Look hon…I really am flattered and all…but I don't want a relationship like this. I still want to go out, and have sex for money-"

"But you won't have to anymore!" Joey exclaimed standing up. 

"Joey…just listen. I don't want a commitment like this. I won't be able to stay with you long enough to find out what this whole thing about me is anyway. So why don't we just make this easier, and-"

She looked up at Joey. Oh dear lord no…he looked as though he was about to go get a bottle of beer and down it, then go get as many as he could and drink them all in one go. Damn, maybe this was the only good thing, the only thing that she'd help someone to do. And she was about to go spoil it by saying she didn't really care about him. But she did! For fuck's sake, she didn't know what to think. 

Mai finally gave up and leant her forehead against her hands. This was just giving her a headache.

"…And what?" Joey asked gently, sitting down next to her.

Mai looked at him and just wanted to squeal like a little girl. His eyes were glazed over and he looked so…innocent. Fuck, why did confusion in his eyes have to be such a damn turn on?! Why did _he _have to be such a turn on to her? Well, he was more than most and sitting here next to him was driving her mental. She just wanted to leap on him. But only if…

"And…this all just seems too good to be true." She laughed shaking her head. 

He smiled back at her, and shook his head. 

"Maybe it is…" he mumbled, bringing his hand to her cheek. 

That simple touch of his was enough for Mai to just completely let it all out. When Mai Valentine wanted something, she took it by any means necessary. And Joey was one of them.

Without a word, she threw her arms around him and before Joey even knew what had happened, he was on his back with Mai atop, kissing him. He mumbled something against her lips and she pulled away from him. 

"W-What?" She said suddenly, afraid that he didn't like what she was doing. 

Joey laughed and shook his head, "I don't like being in this position." 

He gripped his hands around her waist and pushed her to the side, onto the bed in one solid motion. His hands were placed flat against the bed, at either side of her head and he was looking down at her lustfully. 

"But I don't like this position either!" she whined. "So what shall we do, Joseph?" 

He didn't answer and instead kissed her again. She just let him continue, not wanting to spoil the moment with her incoherent arguing. She began to pull the shirt off him, while his hands travelled down the back of the dress where her zipper was and undid hastily. Both of them tossed everything away until the only thing that they were wearing was a lustful expression. 

Mai expected him to have a little bit more foreplay but was surprised when after they were shed of clothing, he was about to enter her. She stopped him by putting her hands on his chest and looked up at him. 

"Mai?" 

"Don't you want to play around a little more?" she asked curiously. He did seem to want to, she could tell. Anyone would be insane not to want to…and Joey wasn't insane. 

"No." He was insane. 

"Oh?" She asked raising an eyebrow and smirking at him, "So you're telling me, you don't want to lick my body as if I were covered in alcohol?"

"You _are_ my alcohol." He replied.

Looking up at him, she stared intently at him before giggling and pushing him a little. 

"Well hon, there's a first time for everything." She told him in a whisper. 

Joey interlaced their fingers in one hand and used the other to hold her around the waist, as he entered. She bit lip to stop from screaming in pleasure, because she never wanted anyone no matter who, to acknowledge that they were doing a pretty damn great job. But he was just…so different. It felt like she'd never had sex before, it felt she was still a virgin even at her age and that he was just so madly in love with her that this was one night in a dorm room at their college that just got out of control. She wanted more of his touch, more of his kisses, more of his warmth on her skin…

He was hardly touching her neck with his lips as he lay his head there, breathing on her, nuzzling her neck. He created such a smooth rhythm that it felt like it would go on forever. He wished that the sun would not rise and the moon would not fade away, so that he could be inside this woman forever.

Gasping for air, they relaxed. Joey rolled over her and pulled her closer to him, unwilling to let her go. Why did it have to end? Fuck, they just wanted to go on, and on but they were so exhausted. 

Mai knew then. She _did _love him and he _did _love her. And she knew why it was so different from all those other times she'd had sex…she wasn't just having sex this time, she was making love and by making love she meant she was falling in love.

Both of them were. 

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Author's Notes: Argh, see that was soooooo corny!! But don't worry; I've got a whole load of darkness. And remember people, when life hands you a lemon, WRITE IT! 


	6. What A Complicated Feeling Love Can Be

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**Disclaimer: **I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Author's Notes: Sorry for such a LONG absence, but my PC went haywire and so had to get it fixed. And now that it is, it's time to continue with this fic! - And let me reassure you this fic is FAR from finished. I've got some more stuff coming into it. And plus there is a sequel. Count on it.

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Chapter Six: What A Complicated Feeling Love Can Be

The morning sky was a light shade of blue as the sun brightened up. Its light rays passed through every window of every building lighting up even the darkest corner of every room.

There was a shuffle and creaking noise as she stirred. She rubbed her cheek against the soft pillow and opened her eyes reluctantly.

The sight that befell her was almost alarming until she realized where she was. Her surroundings were not those of the previous hotel she'd been staying at. She smiled knowing she wouldn't have to go anywhere. It was different now.

She woke up and searched the room for Joey, but found no signs of him. She laughed a little. That was right…last night. The sex was amazing but was absolutely nothing compared to the feeling of what she now knew was love. It was so…_special_, that she could have sworn everything she ever thought love was (which was nothing to her in the past), was all wrong. It was to feel so great when your lover was around and then so miserably depressed when they weren't. That's what it was. She'd give anything to keep the feeling. She knew it _sounded_ rotten to be miserable but it wasn't so bad when you were. It was…_wonderful_.

Mai yawned and stretched her arms, going to the bathroom where a shower was. It was in the corner of the room, and there was too big a space in the whole room. She'd have to mention for him to get a bath fitted in.

She sighed and searched through the draws near his bed to find a towel. She grabbed her clothes too, and closed the door to the bathroom not bothering to lock it. Did it really matter if Joey came waltzing in? She could easily tell him to piss off. He'd obey. And if not…she smirked. She knew exactly what.

The water was hot instantly as she got in. Mai lifted her head and ran her fingers through her hair, letting the water pass through single strands to wash it free of any dirt.

"I know you're there, Joey." Mai said opening her eyes and turning her head slightly to look at him.

She was right, he was there leaning against the doorframe and looking at her eyes, rather than her body. Well, he was probably really desperate to look at her but was trying so hard to fight off the temptation.

"And who gave you permission to use my shower?" He asked raising an eyebrow.

"I helped myself. You should really stop being so stupid and dim sometimes." She mocked continuing to get washed. "Now if you don't mind, I'd like some privacy."

"Actually I do." Joey replied walking closer to her.

Mai sighed and shook her head, "Tough. I'm not moving."

"Ok then." He said, stepping into the shower himself, fully clothed. "I guess we'll just have to _share_."

Mai backed away from him, looking over him.

"What kind of idiot gets showered_ with his clothes **on**_?" She asked laughing at him.

Joey frowned and before he knew what was going on, a whole torrent of water was being poured onto his face. Immediately, he responded by attacking the woman and pinning her against the wall. She stopped laughing to stare into his…_loving_ eyes? It certainly wasn't a lust filled expression like before because Mai always knew a lustful stare. After all she'd put up with lusty looks for almost six years now. Maybe he _was_ looking _lovingly_ at her…

"A kind of idiot like me." Joey said, breaking the silence after a while.

Mai smiled and kissed him, dropping the shower head to the white surfaced floor beneath them. She pulled him closer, bringing her thigh up and rubbing it against the side of his leg. She smirked and pulled away, leaning her head against the wall while he nuzzled her neck.

"So where did you run off to this morning?" She asked as he pulled away.

"To go find a job," He answered, shaking his hair about sending droplets of water around the place, "fucking bastards wouldn't let me have it."

Mai just smiled and shook her own head, "You know Joseph, you don't have to get to get the money…"

"Yes I do." He said staring blankly at her.

There was a silence in which Joey tried to understand why Mai had said that, before he realized what she meant. He just looked at her and shrugged.

"Unless…that's _your _money…so…" Mai looked at the ground. She whished she hadn't blurted that out. But it was true, she'd told him last night that she wanted continue to do what she did. It was oddly pleasing…and she knew it was the only way for her to live. Something was nagging her in the back of her mind. Something was holding her back from living that so called 'dream' she had, had since she was a child. Fear…a fear of what was to come…of what was to happen to them. She had decided from the beginning that she was a woman who _didn't_ need to be _looked_ _after_ but to be _cared_ for and loved. Not looked after. That was what it felt like. He was getting money for both of them and it just made her feel completely uncomfortable. She wanted to get her own money, to pay her own way.

"You just love the sex, don't you?" He suddenly said, making her snap her head up.

"What?"

"You heard me. It's true. Godammit Mai! You made me believe…"

"Joey what are you talking about?!"

He looked helplessly at the ceiling and then at her with hopeless look. He shook his head. She was Venus, she was Calypso, she was Aphrodite, and she was _amazing_. But he wasn't about to let that blind him from who she really was. As he watched her wrap a towel around herself, he sighed. She made him feel so incredibly weak. So weak that he needed her to keep his strength up. It was strange yet he enjoyed this feeling of weakness and vulnerability. So the thought of her with some men…just made him mad. He didn't want her to go out and do what she _used_ to do for a living. He wanted her with _him_. Joey would be the only person to caress her, to kiss her, to make her feel good---_great _during the night and day if necessary.

"I don't want you going out there and---argh!" He closed his eyes when the image of her sharing someone else's bed other than his came into his mind.

"Oh…and who the hell do you think you are?!" she snapped back at him, "You're telling me who to be!! You're talking about me as if I'm your property!! Like some worthless piece of junk you keep because you can't be bothered to throw it away!"

"That's not true Mai, that isn't fucking right!!" Joey yelled. He was frustrated. He was lashing out on her with his anger when his anger was purely not meant to be for her.

"Joey you just said that I-"

"I know what I said, Mai."

Before Joey could open his mouth to say something else Mai cut in, "So you think I'm just a sex obsessed woman---in fact you might think that I'm just a whore."

"No, no, no!"

"THEN WHAT JOEY?!"

"I DON'T KNOW MAI!" He shouted back, glaring at her. "It's hard enough to try and figure out what's happening to me without you knowing _I **love** you_!"

Mai froze. She stared at him. _He loved her_? He'd said it. He had just said the three fatal words she'd always wanted to hear.

"Y-You…_love_…me? But I didn't know Joey." She whispered tears stinging in her eyes.

"Yeah Mai. I do. And I know you didn't…but you do now."

****

* * *

_When people used to go on about love when I was little, I used to think it was some fairy tale world where you transported to. I thought you'd live like a princess with a whole family and magical creatures. And then I got old and came to the real world. Joey told me he loved me. But I don't understand it---how can you love someone? I don't understand what love is…Is it the feeling of misery when he's away or is it the feeling of anxiety when he's away? Because I sure as hell know it can't be both. It's a confusing state to be in and I hate it. Maybe love is like hate…you really know when you hate someone…so love must be the complete opposite…mustn't it?_

* * *

****

He'd left in silence leaving Mai alone to wonder what she was going to do now. Someone was in love with her. He'd said it like he really meant it. It was true any fool could say the three words and sound like they meant it but in the end they never did. But Joey…he did. He got jealous when Mai talked about keeping to her old job. And the way he was with her last night…she was falling in love with him too and that was a fact. So what would she do? Tell him and then act as if nothing had happened? No, she'd been through too much with him to just do that. It was too hard to go on and act like the past twenty four years had never existed. And she'd closed so many doors behind her she was too tired to do it all over again. ****

The fact was she knew she was in love too, but every time she thought about telling him she felt like being sick and she just couldn't understand why. Wasn't she meant to feel like she was floating on cloud nine? Like she was in heaven or something? Why did she feel so sick? And then she realized it. Never once in her entire life had someone said those words to her---_I love you_. She'd never been loved by anyone before and whenever something new came into her life she just wanted to be sick. She wanted to faint into some sort of coma and not awake until everything was not so confusing. Yeah, but that would never happen. She had to figure all of this out on her own.

She rose from the bed and looked outside at the warm day. Maybe just a little fresh air would do her some good…but before she could reach for her jacket, the door opened, revealing a very worn out Joey. He staggered in and fell onto the bed, falling asleep almost instantly.

"Joey? Where have you been?" Mai asked lying next to him and looking at his tired eyes which were fighting to stay open.

"I've been…getting a…job…" he mumbled into the pillow, closing his eyes. "I…got it…and…"

Mai smiled when she knew he'd fallen asleep. Gently, she got off the bed and pulled the blanket over him. She ran her hands through his blond rugged hair, hesitantly kissing him on the forehead.

"Sleep tight hon." She whispered.

With a sigh, she grabbed her jacket putting it on and leaving. Wrapping it around herself tightly, she walked onto the street, breathing deeply.

She loved Joey, it was obvious now. But what happened now? Were they just going to live happily ever after? No, Mai needed something to do during the day. And the only thing she could think of was doing what she did best. However if Joey didn't want her to…then what else could she do? She couldn't just stay at _home _(she was now willing to call their place home) doing nothing could she? But she didn't want a job either. Besides she had no qualifications whatsoever. She wouldn't be able to work.

As she rounded a corner, a car suddenly zoomed past, almost knocking her over. She froze as it skidded to a halt in front of her. Unfortunately she was in a remote part of the city and no one was around.

She was about to turn and run when she felt a sharp pain shoot through her arm. Her vision suddenly blurred as she fainted to the ground below, letting out a small gasp.

****

* * *

Author's Notes: Argh, sorry, I've been so pre-occupied lately. Well actually I've been procrastinating. Sorry! Any please keep reviewing if you want to know what happens to Mai! Thankies!


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